Friday, February 12, 2016

Undermining My Achievement

My husband would on regular basis say, ‘thank you for your hard work.’ I’ve never been comfortable with it.

  1. I’m just doing house work: my husband teaches and does research on his own time which I consider his second job. I’ve had my job as an NP for my day job, so I considered house work my job.  
  2. If I did not do the dishes once or twice and let it pile up, the ‘hard work’ is only my fault. It wouldn’t have been ‘hard’ if I had washed them after each meal.
  3. When he tells me that after I’ve done cleaning work like vacuuming or ironing, I feel ashamed because more time than not, I’ve put off doing them for some week before I finally got to it.
  4. If I was in the kitchen cocking a rather elaborate meal (instead of just a stir-fry, for instance), baking quick breads or cookies. I feel like I’m the one using time for ‘frivolous’ things instead of cooking regular meals and don’t deserve the words.

But I think I’m going to stop feeling guilty. I think from now on I’ll just take it as what it is. Maybe it’s like brushing it off when someone compliments you on how you dress. But maybe I’m wrong.

The other thing that occurred to me is that I don’t think I’ve ever said that to him for his ‘regular’ jobs. I might say ‘congratulations’ for getting through the semester or finishing an aspect of research but that’s about it. Maybe I should be saying it to him on a regular basis.

Does your partner thank you for doing housework? 

By Vitor Mazuco, via Wikimedia Commons

I cook most of the meals but I don’t create recipes. I rely on recipes on the web and books. So to pay tribute to all the food bloggers and people who contribute recipes out there, I’m  posting recipes that I’ve recently tried and liked.
In the past few days I’ve made:

Low Sugar Meyer Lemon Chia Seed Muffins: Fluffy, high-rising. I did use ground flax seed since I didn’t have chia seeds.

Chai Spiced Pear Bread: Although I did change the ratio of spices

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