Wednesday, December 23, 2015

Brain Fog - Afterwards Clarity and a Clean Kitchen

After starting treated for depression, I started noticing when I am depressed. Until then, I had pretty much no insight. Although I can’t change the depressive episodes that much, at least I can warn my husband that ‘I’m not doing good’ if I know. Then he won’t have to tip-toe around me, not knowing what is wrong (he may even interpret my mood as a manifestation of something he did wrong. He’s that kind of a husband). Also, I can be a little easy on myself.

If I were to say my normal mood would be 80 to 100%, the depressed episode will be about 50%. But there are slight depressive episodes, around 60 to 75% that are difficult to recognize. Those days, I feel tired and something hanging over my head, like my brain is fogged up. But I will be thinking that I’m just not getting enough sleep or I’m just being lazy. So I am fighting most of those days to keep moving, to be productive and berating myself for not doing much. I wish I knew what part of is actual depression and what part is laziness.

Sometimes when the ‘brain fog’ clears, I realize how foggy-brained I was for the past few days. I also see a cluttered kitchen counter. I’ve just noticed recently, like in the past 2 to 3 weeks. When I’m doing well, the kitchen counter is organized and not much things are on there. On the other hand, when I’m having my brain foggy days, I seem to just start piling things up and not putting them away. I don’t see my brain fog manifests anywhere else so obviously.

By Thermos via Wikimedia Commons

I am now wondering if I will be able to realize that I’m at 60 to 75% when I see a cluttered kitchen.

I cook most of the meals but I don’t create recipes. I rely on recipes on the web and books. So to pay tribute to all the food bloggers and people who contribute recipes out there, I’m  posting recipes that I’ve recently tried and liked.In the past few days I’ve made: 

Chicken Adobo with Yellow Rice Pilaf: This was a very nice combination.
Double Chocolate Hazelnut Cookies with Sea Salt: A nirvana for the chocoholic with hankering for hazelnut.

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